BAYLOR JOSEPH CALDWELL

Our newest addition, Baylor Joseph, was born today via c-section at 1:19pm. Baylor weighs 7 lbs even and is 19 3/4 inches long. He is just amazing. Baylor and I are both doing well, but are tired after such an eventful day. Grayson was the first to meet his brother and is already very protective and a tad bit possessive over his "baby brother".

I will post his birth story later this week when I have more energy, but I did want to post some pictures before trying to get some sleep.

THIS TIME TOMORROW. . .

our new little one will be here! Isn't that crazy?!?!? I am so excited. We have been so busy preparing lately that tomorrow has totally crept up on me. I just can't believe it. Speaking of being so busy. . .so many of you have sent sweet emails and messages. If I have not responded, please forgive me. We have been swamped. Your kind words and thoughts mean the world to me and it warms my heart to know that so many are eagerly anticipating the arrival of our little one and praying for his health and safe delivery.

As I try to wind down tonight and get ready for bed, I can't help but think about the night before Grayson was born. Grayson was scheduled for induction on April 22nd. I had mixed feelings about being induced because I wanted his birthday to be the day he was really ready to arrive. I prayed and prayed he would come on his own. I was scheduled to arrive at the hospital at 7 am. Justin and I both went to bed and barely slept at all. We were so excited for the coming day.
-TMI ALERT (Childbirth stuff in the coming paragraphs)-
At 3 am I got up to go to the bathroom, a very common occurance for a 9 month pregnant woman. I went to the restroom and as I was about to get up a huge gush of fluid came out and it wasn't urine. My water broke. Justin jumped up immediately and the rush began. I called the doctor and he said to get right to the hospital. I wasn't hurting and was pretty sure that I wasn't contracting regularly so I took my time getting ready. I took a shower, Justin did some laundry, and then we hit the road.

On the way to the hospital I began contracting some but not bad. We arrived around 5am. After checking in and being hooked to monitors it was confirmed that even though my water did break I was not really progressing. I was contracting, but the contractions were mild and irregular. The doctor recommended pitocin and I went with it. Pitocin was started at 6 am. I now think that stuff comes straight from the veins of the devil. Needing it to deliver Avery confirmed that my memory served me correctly and it is really THAT awful.

My plan was to do without pain meds. I made it to 9 am and 6cm without drugs, but that Pitocin was no joke. The nurse kept telling me that it causes hard contractions and if I wanted to progress to 10cm, then they were going to need to increase the Pitocin. All I could think was, "INCREASE?!?!?!? This stuff is miserable already!" She also kept telling me that no one has Pitocin and not an epideural. Thanks for pysching me out.

At 10 am I got my epideural and went to sleep. It was a nice relief for me and for Justin who had been amazingly supportive of my plan to go without paid meds, but was thrilled when I accepted them. At 11:30 I awoke to some pressure and the nurse came in to check me. I was fully dialated and we started pushing. After about an hour of pushing the nurse noted that Grayson's heartrate was dropping with each push. She decided he needed a break. I still find it interesting that at lunch time, "the baby" needed a break. Anyway, she instructed me to rest for an hour and call her if I felt an increase in pressure. Around 1:30 the nurse returned and we started pushing again.

Around 2:10 she announced that we were almost there and called the doctor. After a couple more pushes Grayson Charles was born at 2:19 pm weighing 6lbs, 8 ounces and measuring 20 inches long. He was perfect. He had beautiful skin and was just perfect. He nursed right away and even at birth displayed the gentle and easy going demeanor he is adored for today. The last two years with him have been amazing and I am excited to see what a wonderful big brother he is going to be.

Tomorrow's birth experience is going to be completely differnt than my journey with both Grayson and the twins. Tomorrow is a scheduled C-Section. This is honestly a place I never thought I would end up. I really wanted to try for a natural plan again knowing I could refuse pitocin (something I was not aware of with Grayson). God had a different plan. I did do some research about why babies stay breech and I have found some peace in my research. Apparently some babies stay breech because of the position of the cord and the fact that it would be dangerous for them to flip. I feel better knowing that it may be necessary for his health for my little guy to be the wrong way. Yes, I am still crazy nervous about the c-section. I have never had any major surgery and my last expereince in a Labor and Delivery OR was not a positive one.

Thanks in advance for all the prayers tomorrow. We will post an announcement on FB as soon as baby arrives and I will update the blog as soon as I am able. For those planning to visit, we are asking for no visitors until after 5pm. Grayson takes an afternoon nap and we want him to be the first to meet his brother. Thanks in advance for respecting our wishes for that experience to be special for us with our boys. We will likely be at Western Wake Med until Friday. We are happy to have visitors at the hospital anytime Wedensday, Thursday, or Friday evening (in our home). If you plan to stop by our home, please call first. Now I am off to have a snack (since I can't eat for the next 12 hours) and then to try to get some sleep.

39 WEEKS & BUSY-BUSY

I can't believe Little Firecracker is still hanging in there at 39 weeks. I really thought this baby would be here by now. Oh well, he will come when he is ready or he will be taken by c-section on Tuesday. Either way, this is our last weekend before Baby Brother arrives.

I don't have to make excuses about not blogging lately. We have been overwhelmed. In addition to preparing for our addition and trying to catch up from bedrest before maternity leave, we have been hit with some pretty major stuff lately. Some joyful, some sad. Some good, some bad. Some stressful, some relaxing. Some fun, some exhausting. Some easy, some overwhelming. Some for sharing, some not. During the rest of this post I will update about some of what we have been up to. Other things, I will not share. I will not apologize for not sharing because I don't feel led to share all of our personal goings on. Just know that we are overwhelmed on most days and as we are called to do as a family we are praying and working our way through it. God is carrying us and I have felt His presence more lately than I have in a while. For that, I am thankful.

As summer has gotten into full swing our schedule has changed a bit. Grayson is now in preschool on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. He will go for the month of June, have a break the week following Independence Day, and go for the month of July. He will be out in August and then return to school for the regular school year after we return from vacation in September. Baby Brother will be attending the same preschool in the infant room beginning in October. Grayson loves school. When he was out the week after Memorial Day he asked about his teachers almost every day. That let me know that I made the right choice by enrolling him in the summer program.

Since his schedule changed and public schools/universities are out (Mommy and Daddy Hantla work in education) we are no longer keeping the Hantla children on Fridays. Grayson really misses seeing them so we try to get together to play regularly. For their last week with us Katie and Bryce kept Grayson that Thursday evening so Justin and I could go on a date. Since they were at our home that evening and their kids were coming here Friday morning, we decided to just do a sleepover. So, Grayson had his first sleepover (other than his cousins) with Rin and Abe. They were adorable in the morning when they realized they were all waking up at the same place.


Grayson spent Father's Day weekend spending some time with my dad, Papa, and on Sunday spent the day with daddy. It was a fun weekend for Grayson. Nannie and Papa recently put in a pool at their house. For the 1 1/2 days we were there, Grayson spent most of his time in the pool. He has really gained a lot of confidence in the water, which make me feel more comfortable with him being in the water. With his water wings on, he is unstoppable. He loves to "jump high" into the pool all by himself and loves to swim without any help. You can see from the shots that he is a real fish.


He also had a great time swimming with Nanny and Papa, playing with Peyton, and riding the golf cart with Great Granny.



Grayson is talking so much more these days. I know I feel like I am saying that all the time, but every week he has a million new words and phrases. Some of them are pretty funny too. He likes to announce to anyone "I funny ha-ha" (a phrase he learned from Grammy) and he has occasionally tried to get out of trouble by declaring that what he did was "funny". We think he is hilarious and it has been hard to keep a straight face sometimes when discipline is necessary. He talks constantly while we are in the car. He has learned all about stoplights and announces that "Green mean go" when the light turns from red to green. He is becoming more indpendent and will begin most tasks by saying "I do it" and when offered help says "no, not!". We are working on using "no thank-you" instead. He is very compliant and polite most of the time. Our current favorite saying is his reply of compliance when asked to do something. Most of the time our good little boy says "Okay Mommy" or "Okay Daddy" even when you ask him to do something he doesn't particularly want to do (like say good-bye to his friends). Isn't he just too sweet?!?!?

We have hysterical moments around our house regularly. I try to make sure to blog about them so they are not forgotten when he is older. Just the other day, while on the potty, Grayson decided to give me a massage. I typically sit or squat on the floor in front of him when he is on the potty to make sure he doesn't fall in. He reached out and started massaging my shoulders. I have no idea where he learned this, but he is pretty good at it. He did my shoulders, neck, and arms. Later that evening we were at an outdoor movie near our house. There are so many fun, free things to do around here during the summer. Anyway, I wanted Grayson to show Justin how he could massage. He starts at my shoulders and before I know it he is massaging my, ummmmm, chest. Yeah, there were tons of people around. I wanted to crawl in a hole and hide. I am sure they were thinking, ewwwww what goes on at that house. It was hilarious!!!

Grayson likes to bed read to while he is having a number two on the potty. There is one book in particular that has made it to our downstairs half bath and since it is the only one in there, it has been read to Grayson a million times. I finally convinced him to read the book to mommy while he pottied the other day. Is pottied a word? Oh well! Anyway, he babbled on with some made up words and he "read" the book. It went something like this, "A ba be do pa to me ah du happens". So yeah, apparently the word "happens" is used it this book a lot. It was something I have never noticed, but apparently Grayson did. SO SMART!

So, here we are in our last weekend with just the three of us around the house. We went to dinner last night. Note to self, Grayson LOVES shrimp. I was craving seafood so we went to this place near our house. Justin and I considered letting Grayson share some of our meals and at the last minute ordered him his own kid's shrip plate. Good thing we did. Although it was as big as the shrimp plate I ordered, he ate all but 3 of the shrimp. He loved it! Today we took him to the sprayground. That is one of our favorite activities, but it is rare that daddy gets to go with us since I typically take Grayson during the week when I can escape from the office. I have a bunch of work to do this afternoon to prepare for next week and we have church tomorrow. All in all we are just trying to take it easy and get everything done to prepare for the arrival of Firecracker on Tuesday. I can't believe he will be here in 3 days.

Obviously there is still a chance that he will flip over and come on his own. I would be so happy with that and pray for it daily. So, if you want to pray for us and Baby Firecracker PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE pray that he will turn and I will go into labor before Tuesday. That would be an amazing gift. I am not a fan of the C-Section and get more nervous about it the closer we get to the 29th.

VERSION FAIL

The procedure today was unsuccessful, but thankfully uncomplicated. The doctor attempted to turn Firecracker four times. It was incredibly uncomfortable. No, make that painful and frustrating. This little guy didn't budge. He is apparently stuck and the doctor doesn't expect he will turn on his own.

I was hoping if Firecracker wouldn't turn today then the docotor would go ahead and do a c-section. I mean for pete's sake we were there, we were checked in, we had our bags, and Nanny and Papa were with Grayson. No such luck. None of that mattered. Apparently my doctor will not schedule a c-section unless there are complications prior to 39 weeks because the hospital doesn't like for him to. BOOOO!

So where do we go from here? Well, I am shceduled for a c-section on the 29th. If I go into labor before then when I arive at the hospital they will check to see if Firecracker is still breech and do a c-section if he is.

So here we sit at home and still wondering what the next two weeks will hold. I would love to go into labor before the 29th. I would love it even better if this little stinker would turn around and I would go into labor soon! That would be ideal!!! Thanks for all the prayers and words of encouragement today!

VERSION

Tomorrow is the day. I go in at 6:30 and the procedure is scheduled to start at 7:30. I really do not think Firecracker has turned. I am sure he hasn't because I can really feel his head all up around my ribs. My hope for tomorrow is that the version will successfully turn this little man and then I will go into labor shortly after so that he does not have the opportunity to flip back over. That would be my ideal plan. I like that plan. I am sure God just chuckles when I say things like that. That's okay with me. I know His plan will be perfect, but I can't help but wonder what that plan might be.

RRMS

When I was around nine or ten my mom never felt well. That is about all I remember from her first experience with Multiple Sclerosis. She was tired a lot and would sleep for a really long time. I was a kid and the rest is a blur. I do remember her going to lots of doctors and the grown-ups around talking about lots of tests.

I can't remember exactly when she began to feel better but it seems that around the time she started doing better she was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis (MS). This may be a bit of an inaccurate time line, but that is how I remember it. She seemed better and then I was old she had a disease. At the time I did not know, but do now, that the type of MS that my mom has is called Relapsing/Remitting Multiple Sclerosis.
Just click on the term to learn about what that particular type of MS is.

For the rest of my life, since age ten or eleven, my mom has been mostly healthy as far as I know. Again, this is my version of things. It is possible that mom has had relapses throughout that time, but if she did she didn't tell me about it. That is kind of the nature of my mom. She is the forever caregiver and will never stop and let anyone care for her. When she is sick, she doesn't broadcast it and I often don't know if she has felt ill or has not been well. So, as far as I know my mom has been pretty much relapse free most of her life. If she has had any relapse it has been minimal and so much so that she was able to get through it without me knowing about it.

A while ago my mom mentioned her MS and talked about being followed more closely by her specialist. Well obviously that got my antenna up and I have been doing a little reading of my own on RRMS since. As a child I couldn't wrap my mind around the idea that my mom had a disease nor could I even begin to understand the complicated diagnosis.

Fast forward to about 3 1/2 weeks ago. We were having bible study at our house and my mom called as it was starting and left me a message. I decided to check her message just before we got started with our study time. I could hardly understand her. She was asking something about a desk we had, I could tell she was in her car, but her words were all slurred and jumbled. I called her back immediately because I thought something must be wrong. She answered in her usual cheerful voice. She sounded clearer. I asked if she was okay and explained that her speech sounded slurred in her message. She said, "Oh, I am just tired". I explained that I needed to get back to bible study and we ended the call. I just couldn't shake the feeling that something wasn't right.

My concerns began to grow as my imagination went crazy with the "what if it's MS" thoughts. Since I had done some reading I was really hyper sensitive to any of the symptoms and slurred speech was definitely a sign that relapse was happening. I called my mom that Friday (Memorial Weekend) and she seemed okay, but tired. She explained that she had not had energy for several days and just couldn't seem to get with it. At this point I think she was having some other symptoms as well, but as usual she didn't want anyone to worry or fuss over her. I stressed that I felt like she should see her specialist.

On the following Tuesday mom came up and spent the day with Grayson and I. We had a blast and she seemed like her usual self. We went to Monkey Joe's for a bit and Grayson had a blast going down the big slides with his Grammy. Mom said she was feeling better than she had over the weekend, but of course that was after four days of nothing but rest.

On Wednesday my mom went to the doctor. The news wasn't good. My mom is officially in the middle of a MS attack. She is no longer in remission. I feel sick just typing that out. My mom is so outgoing, stays super busy, and is constantly doing for everyone around her. This attack came fast and has been rough.

If you don't know much about MS, it basically attacks various places in your body. One day your speech is slurred, the next you have vocal tremors. One day you can't use your hands, the next your vision blurs. One day you have trouble swallowing food, the next you have trouble making sensible speech. My mom has had all of the symptoms this go around, plus more that I am sure she doesn't tell anyone about.

She immediately began an I.V. steroid called Solu-Medrol. For five days she went to the hospital and spent 2-3 hours having this medicine pumped into her body. She finished those treatments this past Monday. Now she is on a taper down oral form of the same drug. The treatments were rough. They leave you swollen, leave a metallic taste in your mouth, cause fatigue, and the side effects go on and on. My mom was a trooper! I did have to stay on her a lot about getting her rest. She just doesn't like to stop and admit that she needs caring for and that she needs rest. She is not a well behaved patient.

I don't really know what comes next. She will follow-up with her doctor in another couple of weeks and I guess we will find out then how this may play out. MS is super unpredictable and there is no way to know if or when it will go back into remission. There is no way to know if all of the traces will go away and she will fully recover in the aftermath. There is no way to know how she will feel from one day to the next.

Grayson and I went to visit on Tuesday and she had a good day. She has those, good days and bad days. We had fun resting with her and just visiting. It is so hard to see my mom and know that she is unable to be on the go the way she is used to. Don't be mistaken though, she would never let on for one minute that there is anything wrong. In fact, I made sure to get her permission before posting about this because I am sure some of you readers know my mom and had no idea she is going through all of this.

Well, now you know. Please pray for her. She needs healing and our family needs the old her back.

AND AGAIN. . .

I have gone longer than I like to between postings. I had all of the best intentions to blog about all sorts of wonderful things over the last week, but time seems to run very quickly away from me. I guess that should be expected when you spend a month unable to do anything on your to-do list and you have a baby to prepare for, a household to manage, a mommy role to play, and a clinic to run. No, I wouldn't change it for the world. Well, I would like to have changed the best rest thing, but I would not give up any of my responsibilities for the world. They are all blessings.

In addition our lap top has still not been replaced. The new one is due to arrive today and I have done my best to arrange to be home when the Fed Ex guy arrives. I have had a ton to do today and still some appointments so I hope he and I can meet at our house at just the right time. We don't make a lot of big purchases around our house and I really feel like a kid at Christmas waiting for this package to arrive. It has been very frustrating to try to manage my workload with only a desktop at home. My lap top is my work computer. It allows me to work from home when I need to and it is my computer in the office. I have been a wreck without it. I am sure the other gals at work will be happy for me to have my new computer too. That way I can stop constantly booting them out of the way to get to the things I need.

I went to the doctor on Wednesday. I will be 37 weeks tomorrow. The main purpose of this appointment was to see if Firecracker had moved into the appropriate, head down, position and for my Strep-B test. They are no longer concerned with my cervical length since I am now considered full-term. Sure enough this little bugger was still in the wrong position. The doctor gave me the option to schedule an external cephalic version or a c-section for next week. I opted for the version first. The ECV or Version is where the doctor attempts to turn the baby manually by mashing and pushing on the baby from the outside. It has to be done in the hospital where I can have fetal monitoring, ultrasound, and be close to the OR should complications arise and an emergency c-section become necessary. My Version has been scheduled for Tuesday morning at 6:30 am. Well, I am to arrive at 6:30 to begin IV fluids and preparation. I have been told the actual procedure will not begin until around 7:30. There are no guarantees that this will work and I am not sure what the next step will be if the Version is unsuccessful and uneventful. Uneventful meaning that Firecracker does not freak out during the procedure and display symptoms making an emergency c-section necessary.

My doctor did tell me to prepare to have a baby on Tuesday. In his words that basically means, to know it is a possibility and bring your hospital bag with you. I am not holding my breath for that and honestly hope that is not the case since it would mean an unsuccessful Version and c-section. In a perfect world the Version will work and also prompt Baby Firecracker into labor arriving sometime next week. I am not holding my breath for that either since I am trying to be more accepting of the idea that I may still be pregnant at the 40 week mark. That has been a challenge since I spend a good month or more preparing for and expecting this baby to possibly arrive early.

Grayson is also getting to the point that he is OVER the baby in the belly idea. He has made several comments this week about the baby. He now tells the baby to "get out" and "play with me". He has also pointed to my stomach and asked "baby our house?" Meaning, when is that baby going to actually come live at our house instead of in your belly? We went to visit some friends and their new born this week. Grayson loved her! He just couldn't get enough of watching her and wanting to hug and kiss on that little doll. Hopefully he will feel the same way about "brother".

I have decided that pregnancy must be one of those real tests of faith the keep God grinning as women approach the end and the entire family drives themselves crazy with the wondering about when the baby will arrive. I wish I could just sit back and be content in the idea that God knows Firecracker's birthday and that this baby will arrive when he is good and ready. Unfortunately, I am human so I will continue on wondering and stressing about something that is TOTALLY out of my control.

BLOGGER FOUL

It has been over a week since I last posted. I am not delusional enough to assume that all of my 12 followers are sitting on the edge of their seats waiting for me to update, but I do no like to go so long between posts. There have been tons of blog-worthy events lately. I have just been too busy to get to the computer. Well, that and our laptop computer bit the dust so until we can order a new one (hopefully tomorrow) I have to use the desktop. I am not a fan of sitting at a desk at 9 months pregnant for any length of time. It is rather uncomfortable.

Since Dr. B gave me the green light things have been pretty busy around here. Obviously I am still trying to take it easy and have rest time each day since he did say "modified bed rest", but that is easier said than done after you have missed a whole month of getting things done.

Work is incredibly insane right now, which is a blessing. I am thankful we are busy because summer is typically very slow for us. Each day I have to get more creative with the ways I find to things done there after being on bed rest for a month and now without my computer.

We have been busy as a family as well. Over the holiday weekend we went to White Lake for the day. That place always makes me feel refreshed although I will say that being outside in the heat and humidity was not fun for this pregnant girl. We also spend lots of time with friends and celebrated with some pool time and a cookout on Memorial Day while we remembered all those who serve so that we may have the freedoms that we often take for granted.

Grayson completed his first year of preschool last week. I can't believe that went by so fast. He is home this week and then he will begin a Monday, Wednesday, Friday summer program at his preschool next week. I have been super blessed to have him home this week. I have tried to make lots of special time for us since it is his last week home with mommy all to himself before the baby arrives. It hasn't been easy to juggle special mommy time and work, but I am determined to make it happen. Mommy time is important.

On Monday we obviously celebrated the holiday. On Tuesday my mom came up and between work commitments we took Grayson to Monkey Joes. We were going to go pick what is left of the strawberries, but it rained. I have wanted to take Grayson to a strawberry patch for the last two years and each year I have been on bed rest during peak strawberry picking time. It looks like we won't have any homemade jelly again this year. Monkey Joes was a blast, but I have to say that some of those big slides were a little scary. Grayson loved them, but obviously he is too little to get up by himself so mommy or grammy had to go up with him. I would love to know what some people were thinking to themselves when they saw me and my big belly come barreling down those big slides. Actually, I probably don't want to know what they were thinking. After Monkey Joes, Grayson spent the afternoon with Grammy while I attended meetings and they had a blast. Yesterday we went to work for a bit and then I took Grayson to swim and have a picnic at the kiddie pool and sprayground before returning home to work in the afternoon. I just love that place (the sprayground/kiddie pool not my home office)! We spent a lot of time there last summer and I hope even with the new baby we will be able to fit that in this year. Today I have to work, but Grayson will be with me and he enjoys that. Tomorrow we will have the Hantla kids here and that always makes for a fun day!

I am now 35 1/2 weeks pregnant. I don't think Firecracker has decided to turn yet, but I don't have another appointment until next Wednesday. We will find out then if he has turned. Despite the increase in activity, I don't really feel any different so I don't expect this baby to make a terribly early appearance.