MERRY CHRISTMAS

We had a more than fantastic Christmas. As usual it was filled with lots of family time, presents, and sharing in the real meaning of it all, the celebration of the birth of Christ. Grayson enjoyed every minute of it all.

The holiday wasn't without a little sadness. Many of our family and friends were dealing with a first Christmas without important loved ones. We were in that same boat celebrating our first Christmas since the birth and loss of Faith and Avery. It was hard. Lots of family members helped us remember them this Christmas through gifts or oranaments on their own tree in memory of our daughters. It was nice to feel like we weren't alone in missing them at Christmas. The most helpful thing for us was to remember that they were having a much more amazing Christmas celebration in heaven with Jesus. I like to believe that Christmas is a really party up there. That didn't change the fact that all through our celebrations it felt like something or some one, in this case two someones, were missing. I guess it may feel that way forever.

Grayson was able to spend a little time with all of his grandparents (yes, all 8 of them) during Christmas and this weekend. As expected he was spoiled. It was also extra special because this year we chose to be home Christmas Eve night which meant we got to stay at our own house, cozy up in our Christmas PJs, read the Nativity Story before bed, put out cookies and carrots for Santa and the reindeer, and have Santa visit us at home. Christmas morning was so much fun. I think once it all was said and done Grayson finally got the whole concept of Santa. Now the work begins to teach him how all the gift giving relates to celebrating the birth of our Savior. It is very important for that to be the focus of Christmas and for our children to understand that it is about SO much more than presents and Santa.

We had two additional reasons to celbrate this year. One, Jack was home from Iraq and much earlier than expected. Until the second week in December we had no idea he would be with his family for Christmas. Two, my Granny had been in the hospital and made it home Christmas Day in time to open gifts and spend time with all of her family.

Yes, I will say we had a wonderful Christmas. It was another opportunity to count all of the blessings in our lives and an opportunity to praise God for all that he has done and continues to do for us. I hope your's was equally blessed.

MEN IN UNIFORM

I, as most mothers do, think my son is very smart. For the last almost year Grayson's Papa Jack had been deployed to Iraq. With the exception of a visit home for leave over the summer, the only time Grayson has seen Papa Jack has been via webcam or in pictures. Both in the pictures he has seen and on webcam Papa Jack is in his Army uniform.

Last night during dinner the news happened to be on the TV. WRAL was doing a story about one of the NC bases. There was, on the screen, a soldier speaking to a large group. Grayson points to the TV and yells PAPA!!!!. He was so excited. It was not Papa, but the man did resemble Papa Jack a little and I am sure in Grayson's mind he was wearing Papa Jack's clothes.

I wonder if Grayson will recognize Papa when he arrives home tonight. That's right! He is on his way now and will be arriving home TONIGHT! We are all so excited to have him home safely. Thanks for all the prayers to help get him here for Christmas. AND. . .I was totally kidding in the first line. Grayson will definitely recognize him. He is a very smart boy after all.

NOT SUCH A BIG BOY

Besides the anniversary post it has been a while since I have updated. Yes, we have been busy. Thanksgiving was wonderful. We were so blessed to have my entire side of the family over at our home. It was great! My aunt Ret came over the evening before to help me with my first turkey and it turned out great.

Just one short week later we had my office Christmas party at our home and then Grayson's big preschool auction fundraiser which I was a volunteer for. It was a huge success.

We have also had Christmas shopping and decorating to do plus the regular goings on of life. In addition our little guy has kept us busy. Since October 25th Grayson has had a regular periodic fever. The fever comes, lasts about 2 days and then returns in five to seven days after leaving. Grayson has had a few other symptoms along the way (congestion, upset tummy, decreased appetite), but no matter the symptoms the pattern remains the same. Last Friday after running a fever the Friday and Saturday before (yep, that was 6 days) Grayson started with another fever. This fever came with spots on his feet. We go to the doctor and he is diagnosed with Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease. Okay, we can totally handle that. I ask the doctor is that is what has been causing his frequent fevers. She says no, this virus wouldn't last that long.

Now, let me go back a bit. Each time Grayson runs a fever it is typically around 102-103 the first day and then between 100.5 and 101.5 the second day. Tylenol will keep it down for the most part and if not alternating between Tylenol and Motrin will. EACH time I call the nurse hotline at Grayson's pediatrician. Each time I explain the repetitive nature of his fevers and each time I am told that it is probably just a virus, but if he is running a fever in 3 days to bring him in (FLU). Well, Grayson is never running a fever by that third day so we keep going. Let me say again this has been going on since October!

Am I frustrated? Yes. Am I worried? Yes. Do I trust our pediatrician? Yes. Did I talk to another professional? ABSOLUTELY!

Last week I spoke with another pediatrician I know who has a lot of respect and admiration for our doctor. She listened to my explanation, asked a LOT of questions, and then completely validated my concern. She said although it is common for kids Grayson's age to catch lots of viruses it is not common for it to happen in such a patterned manner. She also mentioned that most pediatricians are swamped right now and the nurses are really trying to weed out the kids that must be seen from the viruses. At quick glance it does sound like Grayson may just have another virus, but when you look at the calendar and patterns it looks VERY strange.

So, what are we doing? We are giving it a chance to make one more cycle. When we went in with hand, foot, and mouth the doc also gave a prescription for some antibiotics because Grayson had been dealing with some congestion since fever one in October. At that point I was thinking Pneumonia. He finished his antibiotic on a Tuesday. Monday evening he had a fever. Fever left on Wednesday. I am expecting that if the pattern is significant then he will run a fever on Tuesday or Wednesday of this upcoming week. We are praying not!

In other news Grayson has a big boy bed in his room. When he returned from his Nana's today it was there and all made up for him, but his crib was still in the room. Our plan was just to move it in there for a month or so and if he wants to sleep in it, great, if not, oh well. In another month or so the crib is going out. Well, he acted like he loved it. He got ready for bed and pointed to the new bed like that was where he wanted to sleep. We moved it over in front of his crib because the initial location wasn't ideal being right under the light switch where he could stand up and turn the light on and off. We put him in and read a story. He was all cozy and excited. We start saying his prayers and he stands up and starts tossing his bears into his crib. We try to get him to lay down and tuck him in. He started crying and trying to climb into the crib. Okay so he isn't ready. FINE with me. I wasn't ready either. So he gets to be a baby boy for a little longer.

However he doesn't get to be the baby for too much longer. For those who don't know yet, we are expecting our 4th baby in July. No, not a foster baby. We are pregnant and super excited. Grayson is going to be a big brother again and he will need to get into that big boy bed soon enough.

We will continue to work towards our foster license and leave that in God's hands. He has it all worked out anyway. No need for us to try to figure it out on our own.

FRUIT AND FLOWERS

Four years ago, today I married my best friend and the love of my life. I can't tell you how blessed I am to have him in my life. Each year when our anniversary rolls around I have lots of thoughts about how long we have known each other, what our wedding day was like, what our life has been like since the wedding, and most specifically what the last year has been like. This has been a tough one for us. I don't want to focus on that. Let's just say that I wouldn't have wanted to go through 2009 with any other man and I thank God every day for using this last year to make our marriage stronger.

For each anniversary I get him a traditional gift. For year one, paper, I gave him the label from the wine we had at our wedding in a frame. Year two, cotton, I got him a decorative box with a note in it written on 100% cotton paper. Year three, leather, I got him a leather dopp kit. This year proved to be a challenge. Year four is flowers and fruit. Easy for all the men out there, but not so easy for us wives. I ended up getting Justin some boots he has been wanting and attaching some flowers to the gift wrapping. Not ideal, but I was at a loss.

I got the flowers. A dozen red roses, which I love because that is what I carried in our wedding. Justin also got me tickets to A Christmas Carol (the play) and a massage. I was spoiled.

Unfortunately our anniversary didn't turn out just as we had planned. Obviously it didn't because it is 10 pm on the evening of our anniversary and I am posting on here. Justin has not been feeling well for a few days. Today we took Grayson to his Nana's to stay so we could have a romantic weekend. By the time we made it back to Raleigh Justin was feeling really bad and had a really high fever. Off we went to Urgent Care. He has the flu, possibly H1N1. We won't know for sure which type for a couple of days. He is REALLY sick.

So here we sit on our Anniversary. Our nice dinner, cookout milkshakes. Our date out, a trip to CVS for $50.00 Tamiflu. Our entertainment, whatever is on the TV in the background. Our agenda, monitor this fever (currently at 103.8) and hope it breaks soon.

You know, some people would insert here that they wouldn't have it any other way because that is just what you are "supposed" to say next. I would. There are lots of ways I would rather spend our anniversary, but at least we are together. So many people can't be with the love of their life on their anniversary whether it be due to deployment, death, sickness, unfortunate circumstances, work, or other reasons. Lots of people don't get to be together. We are!

So tonight may not be perfect and wonderful, but we have a great life together every day. We have a wonderful son. We both are blessed with the ability to work and have jobs, which during this time is a HUGE blessing. We have a loving and supportive family as well as a wonderful group of loving and supportive friends. All of those people encourage our love for each other and cheer us on when we need it most. Last but not least, we serve an amazing GOD. WE ARE BLESSED. As for our fruit and flowers. Well I am admiring those lovely flowers on my counter, I had cherries in my milkshake, and Justin is sipping on OJ. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO US. . . .(keep reading)

In addition to our Anniversary it is a VERY important man's birthday today. Today is Papa Jack's, my father-in-law's, birthday. If you have been following our posts for any length of time you will know that Papa Jack has been deployed to Iraq for almost a whole year. Fortunately we can't call him today to wish him a happy birthday. Fortunately???? Yep that is right. Fortunately because this amazing hero to our country and our family is on his way home. PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE. We don't know where he is, but he is out of Iraq. It is also looking like maybe (but you should keep praying) he might (yep, might so keep praying) be home for Christmas. It depends on how long it takes him to get to the US and for them to do whatever it is the military does here before they let the soldiers go home to their families. What an amazing Christmas gift that would be for all of us. So, although we would love to talk to him and wish him a happy birthday we are just fine with having to put that off and do it in person. Happy Birthday Papa Jack (wherever you are). We love you and can't wait to see you!