THAT MOM

I was almost her today. Yep, I was almost that mom that sends her child to their Christmas program sick as a dog just so she can see him sing. I didn't, but I almost did.

Baylor Boo had his Christmas program today. He has had asthma attacks two nights this week (Monday and Tuesday) in the middle of the night. Baylor only has issues with asthma when he is sick. Other than the middle of the night attacks, he had no other symptoms until last night. Last night he coughed from 8:00 on. Around 2 am we brought him into our room because we were worried he was disturbing his brother's sleep. He coughed and tossed until around 4:30. He slept from 4:30-6:00 and then he was up for the day coughing and hacking. Sometime in the middle of the tossing and turning he began to run a fever. In my fog of overtiredness, not feeling good myself, I have to get up at 5:30 and see clients today haze I do not know when the fever started. At any rate, it was pretty obvious that he was sick.

I got up and began getting ready for the day on the verge of tears at the realization that he was going to miss his last day of preschool and his Christmas Program. So I began considering pumping him with motrin and taking him anyway (crazy, huh). I mean it isn't like this was some big production and he had the leading role. Nope. He was just singing two songs, but my heart was set on seeing him sing those songs. So when he came downstairs I began with, "Baylor are you excited about your Christmas Program today?" He looked at me like I was crazy. He wasn't so off base. He replied, "Mommy I not go to school. I sick." I continued my insanity and tried my very best to convince him we could take medicine, eat peppermint candy, and he could ONLY go for the performance and come home. He wasn't budging. He actually said, "Mommy, I can't sing! I'm sick! See, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells. . .hack hack hack (fake cough font). See I can not go!"

Yes, I finally realized how insane I was being. I imagined us at the program smiling as he takes the stage. I imagined how he would likely begin a hacking fit as soon as they started to sing. I imagined how he would cough all over his little friends and their parents would look on in shock that someone would put their kid up there sick exposing all the other kids to the sick germs. I imagined all of that playing out and realized I was not being rational. Yes, I wanted more than anything to see him sing "Jingle Bells" and "Away in a Manger", but I realized it just wasn't going to happen this year. Maybe next year.